Photograph: Justin Lambert/Getty
When is the end? When will we die? No one knows the exact answer to that question unless they take their own life. However, there is one thing everyone knows – that they will eventually die. That doesn’t make it easy for the person, the family, and friends of that person. It’s a cycle in life though. We get happy when a baby is born but that baby will one day have to leave the world. It’s sad.
Death brings a certain type of feeling and mood. It brings a certain type of darkness which can make you sad, angry, gloomy, or all of the above. When you have an attachment or bond with someone, losing them is very hard. You find yourself wishing they could come back or to have one last conversation with them. Life is a journey and an experience. We have to try to make the best despite all of the bad times in life.
The Netflix original movie Irreplaceable You directed by Stephanie Laing shows the meaning of life and death. The movie is about a woman named Abbie who is diagnosed with cancer, the evil disease. She is in shock and heartbroken from the news like how most people would feel. She learned it’s a rare type of cancer and she might not have long to live. She is married and is deeply in love with her husband. However, she feels without her he would be lost. She starts to plan his life for when she is gone. She sets reminders and made menus for him to always remember. She starts teaching him how to do laundry and other household chores. It seems that she starts doing all of this to try to cope with the pain. She even tries to set him up with a girl before she leaves because she doesn’t want him to date the wrong woman. The movie shows different emotions that comes from a loved one being really sick or a loved one that died. The movie reminds us how we should appreciate our loved ones, let them know how we feel, and to make memories with them.
Not everyone gets the opportunity to spend time with their loved ones before they die or to tell them bye. Many times we as humans wish we could have said some last words to our loved ones, hoping it would make us feel better. It would be nice to get that chance to do that. Although, I always wondered if it would help. I don’t think there are perfect words to tell someone bye for good. It will still be hard and emotional to deal with them being gone, especially when you and that person were close to each other.
Everyone copes and grieves differently. Some people work overtime so they don’t have to be lost in their thoughts for too long. Some start to behave badly and spiral out of control. Some people even change for the better because they want to make the person proud. There are many other things people do to cope. Sometimes it’s hard to comfort people that are dealing with the death of a loved one because you don’t know what to say or do to make them feel better. You don’t want to say the wrong thing to make them upset or to make them cry more. Sometimes just being there for some people is enough.
The bond and memories you share with someone is something that can never be replaced. Sometimes people die before we tell them how we really feel, while we are not talking, or during an argument. We never know when it will be our time or our loved ones’ time. It is good to always tell people what we are thinking. Let them know how much they are loved and cared about. Also, try not to stop talking to them and try to find a solution both of you guys agree on. Holding grudges is not good especially when you really love and care for a person. Every situation is different but if you think you will regret not smoothing out things with the person then you should talk to them. Although, it will still be emotional when the person dies but at least you won’t have that regret.
Death hurts and it’s hard but we have to figure out how to find happiness again and carry the memories of the person that died. It’s good to live our lives the way we want to and do what will make us happy because there will come a day when we will no longer be alive. It’s a fact we must all accept at some point because it will happen. So, live your life, cherish your loved ones, and be happy. Try not to stress so much and let go more.