Blue Eyed Blues

Don’t look into her blue eyes because you’ll see the real her.

If you look long enough, you’ll see every layer that makes her who she is. 

You’ll see happiness. You’ll see her memories.

You’ll see a baby with a smile, staring up at her parents and hugging her sister.

You’ll see memories of a young girl playing in the sand with her cousins, running into an ocean as blue as her eyes.

You’ll see her flying kites.

You’ll see happiness.

If you stare into her eyes long enough, you’ll see a girl with her best friend and sister pretending to be Destiny’s Child, writing their own songs and making up dances at the ages of seven and nine.

You’ll see her play the piano and write poetry. Music was her passion.

You’ll see her running track. She wasn’t the best but she loved it. 

You’ll see her with a big smile on her face.

If you look long enough you’ll see a young girl love for the first time.

You’ll see a young girl spending time with her favorite uncle, watching Law and Order. He taught her something new every day.

You’ll see a college girl finally finding herself and her purpose in this crazy thing called life.

You’ll see happiness. 

Stare a little longer.

You’ll see more memories

You’ll see her pain.

You’ll see a young child begging her parents to stay together.

You’ll see a young girl change herself because the people around her do not accept her for who she is.

You’ll see her looking in the mirror hating what she sees. She was ashamed of who she was.

You’ll see her living in a world where she can’t trust anyone.

You’ll see her carrying the pain of her family.

You’ll see her hold her mother as she cries. She had to be strong.

You’ll see her father fall into depression. He didn’t want to help himself.

You’ll see her carrying the pain of her sister. She doesn’t want anyone to hurt her again.

You’ll see a girl weighed down by her insecurities.

You’ll see her begging her uncle to put the bottle down. You’ll see how angry she was with him.

You’ll see a young girl take for granted the time her family has left on this earth.

You’ll see her drop to the floor in agony as her mother tells her the news that her uncle is no longer with her. 

You’ll see the pain in her eyes.

You’ll see her praying for a second chance to get him back. Just one more day, one more hour, one more minute to say “I love you” because she didn’t tell him enough. 

 You’ll see regret.

You’ll see fear.

Fear of death.

Fear of love.

Too fearful to open up.

Too fearful to trust the ones she loves.

You’ll see a young girl calling out for help when no one is listening.

You’ll see her not wanting to be on this earth anymore.

 

She keeps everything inside… why?

 

Is it because she doesn’t want to be a burden?

Is it because she cares for others more than herself?

But nobody cared to ask.

You’ll see her fall into a deep dark depression.

You’ll see her build walls.

It seemed as though she was a different person.

 

And because of all the pain endured… she was. 

 

But with all this pain, you’ll see strength.

Look deeper into her blue eyes.

She IS a whole new person.

A rebirth has taken place.

She’s not afraid to be herself.

Look closely.

You’ll see her overcome every obstacle against her.

You’ll see her overcome depression on her own. She is happy again. 

You’ll see her gain confidence. 

You’ll see she now loves who she is.

You’ll see her loving strangers.

You’ll see she learned how to love again.

You’ll see her wanting to help others in any way possible.

You’ll see she doesn’t settle for less.

You’ll see a girl who is somewhat intimidating, in a boss way.

You’ll see her give her all to the ones she loves despite her own pain.

You’ll see a smile, a warm heart, and a helping hand.

You’ll see she is grateful for everything.

You’ll see a hard worker.

You’ll see peace.

You’ll see growth.

You’ll see prosperity.

You’ll see strength.

You’ll see love.

You’ll see me.

 

Me.

A person who does not dwell on pain because she thrives in happiness.

A new chapter has begun; a rebirth.

 

This is my beginning.