Picture this: You have taken the familiar journey home for the holiday break and although the bright lights are twinkling above and the snow on the ground has a certain sparkle. You are dreading walking through the front door. Family dinners stop being about coming together and enjoying each other’s company and have turned into an endless Q&A session. So how are your classes going? Do you know what you want to do with your degree? Have you done your internship yet?

Sound familiar? Then you must be a senior in college just like me. Woo hoo!

Right?

Senior year is supposed to be one of the most exciting years of your life but instead stressed out does not even begin to describe the current state of mind. As a Media Studies major, I’ve encountered plenty of people who have found my field of study to be interesting but are also curious about what kind of job I can secure once I walk across the stage next May. Normally, I would have an answer lock, loaded, and ready to give to them but it wasn’t until I received my first rejection for an internship that I realized that transitioning into the work force might not be as easy as I thought.

The interview was for one of the hottest radio station conglomerates (not going to name names) in New York City and I was already coming into the interview with the advantage of my dad being an employee of the company, or so I thought. As I sat in the conference room joined by easily 10 other applicants and the representatives from the station, I came to a scary realization. Not only was I the youngest person interviewing for the internship position, but I was also the least prepared. That was the day that I realized that faking it until I made it was not going to cut it. Naturally, I did not get the internship but something good did come out of it.

I walked away from the interview with a new sense of hunger. I took all of the feedback and started completely from scratch, knowing exactly what the station was looking for in an intern. I started a website, started building up my portfolio, trying to mold myself into what I thought that they were looking for.

Fast forward to this semester, I’m writing for the school newspaper and I’m not entirely sure what direction I want to go in. I have always had a passion for writing but music is a big piece of who I am. I’ve always been known as the friend that has had a concrete plan but the person that I am today could not be more further from the girl that I was known to be. Past conversations with family members all come rushing back and I hear my dad in the back of my head constantly. As my Grandma Pam would say, “TV makes more money. Don’t make the same mistake your father did.”

I am not discounting any profession but at the end of the day, everything comes down to dollars and cents. To be honest, my account is overdrawn fifty-three dollars currently so it is completely obvious that I’m hurting for income! I have yet to come to a point in my life where I understand that I can make enough money while still doing the things that I love, which scares the crap out of me.

It is hard to say whether or not I am going to end up at the radio station that I was trying so hard to get hired at. I might just end up back at home living with my parents, working at some pointless retail job that will pay my bills for the time being or I could have a big name job waiting for me as soon as I walk across the stage in May. The reality of wading into uncharted territory is definitely nerve wracking and cause for multiple anxiety attacks.

I am not sure where my path will take me but I am slowly but surely preparing myself to start planning for my future. Let’s see where this goes, ladies and gentleman!