As the world changes, so do the choices individuals make regarding family life. One trend that has gained attention in recent years is the growing number of people deciding not to have children. Whether due to personal values, economic factors, or broader cultural shifts, the decision to remain child-free is becoming more common across different demographic groups.
For Landy, a 45-year-old Christian man from a small town, the decision to not have children isn’t one he arrived at lightly. Raised in a conservative Christian community, Landy grew up in a household where having children was seen as a natural part of life, a part of God’s plan. However, as he reached adulthood, his views began to shift.
“Growing up, it was almost expected that you’d get married and have kids. That’s the way my parents did it, and that’s what the church encouraged,” Landy explains. “But as I got older and started thinking more critically, I realized that having children isn’t necessarily the only way to live a fulfilling life. There are plenty of ways to contribute to the world, and sometimes, having kids can add a lot of stress and responsibility.”
Landy’s decision to remain child-free is influenced by several factors, both personal and spiritual. “I believe in living a life that’s true to my values. The Bible talks a lot about stewardship and how we are to manage the earth’s resources. For me, that means being responsible in how I live and what I take on. Parenting requires a lot of time, energy, and resources, and I feel that I can best serve God and my community in other ways,” he shared.
Landy acknowledges that many in his faith community may see his choice as unconventional, but he feels that a life of purpose doesn’t have to include children. “I don’t think I’m any less of a Christian or a man for choosing not to have kids. For some, it’s part of their path, and that’s great. But for me, it’s about using my life in ways that align with my values.”
Despite his decision, Landy has a lot of respect for parents and acknowledges that parenthood is a noble calling. “If I did have kids, I’d want to be the best father I could be. But at this stage in life, I feel like I’m doing what’s right for me.”
Amber, a 30-year-old lesbian woman living in a bustling city, has a different but equally thoughtful perspective on the decision to remain child-free. While she is part of a marginalized community in many ways, her choice to not have children is rooted in personal and practical reasons, rather than societal pressures or religious beliefs.
“I grew up in a family where kids were always part of the plan,” Amber says. “But as I got older and started to figure out who I was, I realized that having kids just wasn’t something I felt was necessary for my happiness. I’m a lesbian, and for me, a family doesn’t have to look like the typical heterosexual model with kids. There are other ways to create meaningful, fulfilling relationships.”
Amber’s decision is shaped by several key factors. First and foremost, she values her independence and the freedom that comes with not having children. “I want the ability to travel, focus on my career, and build relationships with friends and my partner,” she says. “Parenthood, for me, would mean putting those things on hold or significantly adjusting my priorities. And, honestly, I’m just not ready to give that up.”
In addition to personal freedom, Amber also recognizes the environmental and financial costs of raising children. “When I think about bringing a child into the world, I think about the economic and environmental responsibilities. I know a lot of people have kids because they want to build a family, but in today’s world, the cost of living is high, and we’re facing major environmental challenges. I can’t help but feel that it’s something I personally don’t want to add to. It’s not about being selfish, it’s about being mindful of what I can offer the world.”
Amber has faced some pushback for her decision, especially from her more traditional family members. “There’s always a part of them that hopes I’ll change my mind, but I’m comfortable with my choice. For me, it’s not about rejecting the idea of family—it’s just that my version of family doesn’t have to involve kids.”
Both Landy and Amber’s decisions to not have children reflect broader trends in society, where the definition of family is expanding. In Pew Research Center’s 2024 survey, many people have expressed a desire to break away from the traditional expectation that everyone must eventually become a parent. Factors such as financial instability, environmental concerns, and personal autonomy are leading individuals to reevaluate what fulfillment and legacy mean in their lives.
For Landy, his choice reflects a deeper philosophical and religious consideration about how to live a purposeful life without having children. For Amber, her decision is based on the desire for personal growth and freedom in a world that often assumes women will become mothers. In both cases, their choices illustrate a shift away from the conventional model of family-building and parenthood.
In recent years, there has been a growing acceptance of alternative paths to fulfillment, and the child-free lifestyle is becoming one of them. While parenthood is still a deeply meaningful choice for many, more people are choosing to pursue other forms of happiness, whether that’s through career, travel, friendships, or hobbies.
