Long Distance Love


Is it “absence makes the heart go fonder” or “Out of sight, out of mind”? It is quite difficult to be in a long-distance relationship but despite popular belief, it is not something that is impossible. It requires a strong bond, trust, and patience from both parties. My advice is, never say never!

Long-distance relationships are often discouraged because of how physically and emotionally stressful they can be due to the distance between you and your partner. I will admit that being apart from someone that you love can put a strain on your relationship, but it can also help to strengthen that connection that you share with your lover.

I never thought that I would ever be in a relationship with someone who is thousands of miles away from me and deployed in another country, but love has proven to be worth the sacrifice. The truth is, I thought that I would miss out on the level of intimacy that being in his physical presence would grant me but being in contact with him over the phone has only forced us to become closer. I have learned so many new things about him in the past few months that I did not even know was possible. In a way, it feels like our spirits are intertwined despite lacking physical touch. I fall more and more in love with him each day.

On the downside, it has been very hard because, with his occupation, I am also worried about his safety. The hours that I do not hear from him are the most difficult hours of my life because there is always a possibility that his life could be in danger or he could be badly injured. The distance is also hard because there are days when I just need a hug and the fact that he is not there to physically comfort me hurts me to my core. There are no “date nights,” no “shoulder to cry on” and no hand to hold.

However, his absence makes me yearn for his presence more and it prevents me from taking our time together for granted because I am constantly aware of how quickly life can change. So, you see, even in the negative, there is a positive and I think that is the key to surviving the distance. If you sit and dwell on what you dislike about the situation, all it costs is more pain and that will damage your relationship quicker than you realize.

I know that my experience does not necessarily reflect everyone else’s but as someone who was skeptical about love from a distance, I believe that anyone can change their view if they are exposed to a similar circumstance with someone that they truly adore. When we have preconceived notions about something that we have never experienced, it prevents us from having a fair assessment.

It is important to mention that a long-distance relationship requires both individuals to put in the effort to make it work. If one party fails to commit then it will not last and that will be problematic for everyone involved. The moment you start feeling like you are in it alone, you need to communicate with your person and then with yourself to see if this is the kind of life that you want to sign up for whether temporary or permanent. It is doable but it is also not for everyone because we all have different needs that we require in a union with someone and yours might just be that he/she is physically present in your life and that is completely ok but if it is something that you really want to try for the preservation of your relationship with someone then you should do it and do not let anyone discourage you. The only people that can know if your love can survive being across an ocean is you and your partner, do not allow anyone to project their insecurity unto you. You see, love is the strongest human emotion (even stronger than hate) so there is nothing that it cannot overcome. Time and distance does not stand a chance against that kind of power, remember that!