I Created Something From Within


I have been practicing the art of mindfulness for three years now. When I first began, it all felt more like a chore than anything else. Now I look forward to meditating. There was one experience that topped all and it was right around the time when I started to appreciate the art rather than doing it just to say I did it.

It all started when I sat on my window seat yearning for clarity. I repositioned myself so I could feel the sun welcome her rays on my face. With every breath, the past washed away; a new moment arrived. I closed my eyes and sank into a deep meditation. I could feel my body being supported by the earth. I felt the energy vibrations rise through the environment I was in. My mind was at ease, it was releasing all of the thoughts running through my brain.

Once my mind was completely clear I ended up on a white foggy path that seemed like there wasn’t an ending. I continued to walk down this path until I reached the stairs. I started to count as I climbed down them. Ten, nine, eight, I felt warm. I took a deep breath every time I took a step down. Seven, six, five, I was reassured that I was safe. Four, three, two, one more step. Whatever is at the bottom is reeling me in closer and closer. One, I made it.

I approached a big white door and softly pushed it open with two hands. I was thrown off by how beautiful this garden was. It had perfectly cut grass with all of my favorite flowers. I could smell the pollen drifting in the air and feel the soft breeze brush gently against my hair. After witnessing one of the most alluring things I’ve ever seen, I took a step back. I realized that I had created a safe space for me and my inner thoughts. I forgot everything that troubled me.
I was at peace.

Now knowing what my mind is capable of, I can not wait to come home and find my safe place all over again. Whether it is for an hour or even just a couple of minutes, I will feel like it’s all the time I need once I’m there. There is no perception of time in my safe place. There is no rush and
certainly, no deadline to make.

Growing up, I did not have many outlets to help me escape the outside world. My mind was weak, and I would often find myself dwelling on past situations. I used to dig myself in deep holes, thinking about how life would have been if I attempted a different path. The summer of my Freshman year in college was the year I woke up. I joined a journey that has been nothing but a learning experience.

Meditating has become a large part of my everyday routine. I never understood how powerful our minds were, and I’m thankful to have realized it so young. It has helped me reduce my stress, anxiety, and most importantly, lengthen my attention span. When I was diagnosed with ADHD, the first thing doctors told me would help me focus was Adderall. After taking my medication for a couple of months, I slowly drifted away from who I used to be. I would wake up depressed and never want to eat. That is when I realized that I needed a natural alternative.

With the help of meditation, I was able to calm my hectic thoughts and stay in the present moment with anything I was doing. My inspiration came from a quote by John Kabat Zinn. He said, “mindfulness practice means that we commit fully in each moment to be present; inviting ourselves to interface with this moment in full awareness, to embody as best we can an orientation of calmness, mindfulness, and equanimity right here and right now.”

Living in the present allows your mind to focus on what is right in front of you. You do not drift off to other places.

Creating a safe place was one of the best things I have ever done for myself. I’ve never been as mentally strong as I am right now.